I'm not above bribery

(Oh, quit judging me.) I went out to a grown-up arcade place last night and had some interesting potty training discussions. One girl is actually bribing her 3 year old with a trip to Disneyland if he stays dry for a week. (her sister works there, so they get in for free, but still) That got me thinking...my incentives for Ryan haven't been big enough. And it's always "if you're dry for __ nights in a row." He's only had a handful of dry nights ever...what makes me think he can succeed several in a row? Baby steps! I need to start with one night at a time.

Seriously, Ryan's been potty trained during the day for almost TWO YEARS. Half of his life, people! Yet he still completely soaks his Pull Up at night, sometimes even requiring me to change his sheets. People ask if we cut off his liquids after __:00...and no, I'm bad about that. But how big is this kid's blatter? I've even gone through phases of waking him up before we go to bed, but at that time, he's still dry. So for the last several months, I've ignored the issue completely.

Then tonight during dinner, as Ryan emptied one cup of milk and asked for another, it came to me. I had fun playing Skee-ball and Ms. Pac Man last night, Ryan would, too! So I bribed him with Chuck E Cheese. We never go there. In fact, I think the last time we were there, I was pregnant with Kaylin. Somehow, he still remembers it. (Maybe because we have random tokens floating around the house?)

This has been the hot topic all night. He's giddy with excitement. Then as he was getting into bed, I reminded him of the reward if he wakes up with a dry Pull Up. He announced, "But Mommy, I already peed in my Pull Up." WHAT?!?!?! Seriously, this is what I'm working with! I calmly (as calm as I could be, considering my brain was in awe of what he just said) let him know that the Pull Up is to help him with accidents while he's sleeping, not laziness for not wanting to walk over to the bathroom. I hadn't planned to change him, but when he looked at me eye-to-eye and sincerely said that he was going to try really hard not to pee in his Pull Up tonight, I gave him a dry one for a clean start.

Oh man...he's almost 4 and totally knows what's going on. I wonder if this is a will issue or truly something beyond his control. I'm tempted to put him in underwear at night, but I'm scared of losing my mind changing sheets morning after morning after morning. I honestly believe he just sleeps so soundly that he doesn't get up when he has to go. But we'll see.

Thoughts? Suggestions? HELP? I know I'm not the only one out there who's struggled with this. I also know my child won't go to high school wearing Pull Ups at night. But I'm very open to ideas.

Popcorn Predicament

I feel deceived. And it's not Orville's fault, it's my own. If I make a poor snack choice and know that I'm doing it, I may feel guilt, but certainly not anger. Ignorance sometimes results in anger for me. Petty? Maybe. But true, nonetheless.

When I found the new Orville Redenbacher "Natural" popcorn at the grocery store recently, I was pretty upset. They've been putting garbage in a plain bag of popcorn?!?! It should be popcorn kernels and oil, right? Apparently not so. I bought the natural popcorn which IS popcorn and oil and went on my way.

Around this time, I saw some information comparing a handful of pretzels and 6 cups of popcorn, saying they were roughly the same calories and fat, yet the popcorn is obviously more food and more filling, making it a better snack. We've been eating popcorn about 3-4 days a week as our afternoon snack. I was glad my kids were getting a natural snack.

So yesterday, I grabbed a new box from the store and noticed the "Smart Pop" box next to it, boasting of 94% less fat and 100% whole grain popcorn and all the other good stuff that was supposed to impress me. Hmmm...I looked at the ingredients of the natural stuff, but didn't think to look at the calories and fat. So I did a side-by-side comparison. Sure enough, the popcorn we've been eating every day had 11 grams of fat and the Smart Pop had...two. SERIOUSLY!?!?! Then I compared the ingredients. The Smart Pop had popcorn and oil and less than 2% of this, that and the other thing. I don't need artificial colors and flavors in my food, but if it's less than 2%, should I really care that much? Let me think, um, no 2% isn't worth losing sleep over.

I'm so frustrated that for the last couple of months, I've been eating a seemingly "healthy" snack and consuming 550% more fat than necessary. See? Deceived.

As I've been typing this on our laptop, Kaylin and Ryan have been eating spilled popcorn off the kitchen floor. It's a good thing I mopped this morning. Actually, it's not...they just spilled all over my clean floor. *sigh* I supposed I should be glad the popcorn on the floor has to be relatively clean. (whatever makes me feel better, right?)

To continue their amusement, Ryan spent 20 minutes vacuuming up the unpopped kernels everywhere. When Kaylin decided to crawl under her highchair to "hide like the turtle" [he hides under bushes], Ryan abandoned the vacuum and joined her. The next picture is them "sleeping like the turtle." Whenever the kids find Roger under a bush in the yard, Kaylin always says, "Thththththththth (with her finger over her mouth) - tootoo seepin."

Oh, and YIPPEE for me! When I pulled up my blog to post this, I was the 3000th visitor. If you missed the 2000 hits blog, you won't know how much that delights me.

Super invitation idea!

How cute is this?!?! I realize I make 120 Christmas cards each year, but somehow, 15 of these party invitations seem like more work. Do you ever feel like a lame mom when you see what kinds of parties other people throw? I will feel NO GUILT when I send out an Evite for my kid's party this summer. NONE! Click on the pictures to see all of the detail. (I blocked out their personal info for obvious reasons.)

Yeah, I still got it...

Last week, I found some had-been-lost, over-sized, movie star sunglasses in an old purse. I have a ton of sunglasses floating around, so I hadn't even missed them.

*Can I just interject here (of course I can, it's my blog!) - shopping for sunglasses is almost as cumbersome for me as shopping for a swimsuit. I have the hardest time finding the right pair of must-be-cheap-because-they'll-ultimately-get-lost-or-broken sunglasses that look halfway decent on me. When I lose sunglasses that I love, I know they'll reappear somewhere, but it kills me when the tiny screw falls out or they get stepped on or scratched up sitting on the cool deck around the pool. Does anyone else experience this drama?!?! And don't give me that "off the face, into the case" line that expensive sunglass stores throw around. With a car, pool, diaper bag and two purses to float between, my sunglasses wouldn't stay in their case, even if I had a case to put them in.

Anyway, these sunglasses have been attracting the glances of fellow male drivers, I swear. Last week, some young, 20-something kid in a jacked up truck flashed me a huge flirtatious grin at a stoplight. I was mentally flattered, but went on with my conversation with Ryan, likely looking like I was talking to the voices in my head. Then today, I got a "what's up?" head nod from another guy at another intersection. I looked away, disinterested, then realized how stuck up that must appear. What else could I do? Hold up my ring finger or motion to the children in car seats behind me? Am I still hot now, Rico Suave? I guess I could have smiled back, thankful that strangers still find me worth nodding at. I haven't noticed guys looking at me since I was pregnant. I'll never forget when the cocky deli guy decided to come out from behind the glass to flirt and as he came around the counter, he noticed my huge, 36 week belly. He made a quick U-turn to run and hide.

I have convinced myself that it's gotta be these sunglasses. They scream "Look at me - I think I'm the bomb" in every way. (Do people still say, "the bomb?" Did I just date myself?)

Maybe I'm meditating on this because I need a pick-me-up. Ladies, (and a few gentlemen who read this) I'm not only finding more and more white hairs (yes, I said "white," not gray) but I found two white eyelashes the other day. On different eyes! That made me feel horribly old. If I still colored my hair, I wouldn't see the white hairs, but the eyelashes were hard to miss.

Speaking of, I'm counting on the sun and pool water to lighten my hair this summer, but this fall, I'm going dark. I've toyed with the idea for about a year now, and it is one of the reasons I let my natural, mousey-blonde hair color take over my head. But yesterday at church, I saw a friend (Megan) who recently colored her hair way dark, almost black, and it looks awesome! So that solidified it for me. I was ready to do it this week (before I lost my nerve) then remembered the amazing, natural highlighting powers of the summer Arizona sun. So I'll wait until fall. We're gonna see what Katie looks like as a brunette...should be interesting. (Amy, you also inspired me, girl!)

Different Life Stages

I'm pretty "into" Mommy-life and I'm not ashamed of that in the least. Other than the handful of hours I spend using my big girl brain working, my life revolves around kids and church and being a wife. And I love that!

It always throws me off hearing about people that aren't in this phase of life. For instance, before my friend Jaime recently told me that she was pregnant, she updated me on all of the success she's having in her career. I found myself unable to relate because I'm so out of that loop. But I am thrilled that she's pregnant now so I can suck her dry of all of the Mommy-to-be talk that I love so much. Is that sad?

Then there are my single friends. In our pre-parent days, I found it easier to hang out with them because the only difference between us was that I had a permanent roommate. We both still had careers and relationship problems and interests that didn't revolve around kids.

Early in our marriage, a high school friend, Carey, drove out from her new home in L.A. and introduced us to her friend, Hafid. He was from KC, too, and had recently relocated to Scottsdale. Mike and I adopted Hafid into our life immediately. We spent most of our free time with him over the next year or two until Ryan came along. By then, he got busier with work, we got busier with parenting and we just didn't see each other as often. Then he moved off to Australia and now we're sad that we only get to see him annually.

Lucky for us, he came to visit yesterday. And that's when this whole concept of "different life stages" occurred to me. We chatted easily for the 3 hours that he was at our house, but I finally realized how different our worlds are. There were topics that Mike brought up that I found myself thinking, "Hafid doesn't care about that!" Not that the things we're going through right now aren't important, but seriously, how interesting is coloring and poopy diapers to someone who hops planes all over the world and goes where the wind takes him? Our realities are very different.

Ryan got to take a spin around the block in Haf's two-seater convertible rental car and he thought he was big stuff. Kaylin was not happy that she was too little for a ride. We miss our Iraqi friend with a British accent who lives in Australia but is moving to Singapore. He left a little piece of his interesting life with us yesterday. It's just lightyears away from my world. (BTW, April, he loved your post about the UK...everyone else, you have to read it, too)

Simplicity

Aahhhh...that word just brings a smile to my face. I love simplicity. In planning, in decorating, in organizing my home, in all areas of my life. Do you ever notice how too many choices often complicates things? Unless you know exactly what you're looking for and can't find it among the gazillion choices out there. (like the jeans that fit "just right," the perfect black skirt, the Hallmark card that says what you're feeling) I haven't always been intentional about simplicity. Just since I've had kids, I think. Maybe because baby stuff takes up SO MUCH SPACE and overtook our first house. -?- I can't pinpoint a specific time, but around then sounds about right.

I've noticed that sometimes my desire for simplicity interferes with the thoughtfulness of others. For example, my aunt saved all of my cousin's toys over the years. A couple of years ago, she brought them all over for Ryan...6 huge storage bins full of toys, another bin full of Happy Meal prizes, a bag of movies and several of those huge Rescue Heroes commando-station things that took up a whole closet. I looked at the piles of stuff stacked 3 feet high and immediately wanted to call Good Will to schedule a pick up! I did end up giving most of it away, with her permission. I just couldn't deal with the cluttered feeling of it all.

Another example is gifts: for Ryan's birthday parties, I've always asked people (grandparents excluded) not to bring gifts. Up until this point, I don't think he's noticed. I wanted everyone to come without feeling obligated and besides, we have plenty of toys and "stuff." This year, I've decided that my selfish desire to keep the house uncluttered will be stifled. Ryan has been to enough birthday parties this year to finally "get" that birthdays = cake and presents. It was nice while it lasted! Plus, last year no one listened to me and he got a bunch of gifts anyway. I guess the suggestion was too unconventional for the majority.

When I think of the movies and shows from 50, 60, 70 years ago...times seemed so simple. I'm not stupid enough to believe that it was June Cleaver perfect all the time; I realize there are different issues in each generation. But think about it: little technology, no video games, limited t.v., the kids went outside to play, ride their bikes, skip rocks and they used their imaginations, (do you hear the theme music starting in the background?)...I know I sound like a dork, but I seriously love the simplicity of it all.

What is life going to be like 30 years from now? If we (me included) can justify young kids having cell phones and playing Leap Frog and Vtech video games to help them learn to add and read, I can't imagine what things will be like for our grandkids. Okay, I'm starting to sound like my grandmother....

I want my kids to grow up appreciating the little things, hopefully being low-maintenance and not needing to be entertained all the time. When the time comes, I pray that I stick to my guns and won't get each child over-involved in this sport and that hobby and all of the different activities that suck time out of the lives of so many families today. And on that note, I'm learning that kid-sports are nuts! I've heard of several friends with 2-3 kids (who consciously limit their child to one sport each) are going nuts carpooling to 2 practices a week plus a game, stressing over being the team mom and snack mom and are still go-go-go. I think the toddler years are tough, but I forget that sports and homework and heartbreak because "I wasn't invited to Johnny's birthday party" are all right around the corner. My ideal, simplistic lifestyle could be a thing of the past.

For now, I have a tendency to steer my kids away from the t.v. and send them outside (while the weather is still bearable). I love when they play their versions of Hide and Go Seek, Ring Around the Rosie and chase each other all over the yard or the house. I find myself a little surprised when they actually enjoy themselves for more than 5 minutes doing a simple craft or activity. And I get a little giddy inside when the play room goes untouched for a whole day...that indicates that we've had a "simple" day. As the days get warmer and we're starting to use the pool, I look forward to enjoying the simple pleasures of summer. I just love simplicity.

School pictures

WHAT is up with schools doing pictures twice a year now??? They try to hit you up to buy pictures at $12.50 a sheet...twice?!?!? Apparently, this is common. As if avoiding the temptation the first time wasn't enough.

The picture Ryan got at his little pre-school this fall was pretty average. No urge to buy those...I take cuter pictures at home, thanks. But the ones they just took recently? My kid actually sat still, posed and smiled. TWICE! I'm still in shock. Check out my big boy...

The cheesy hand-over-hand, leaning-on-his-cheek shot was due to bright green Curious George stamps on each hand. I was bummed that the ink wouldn't wash off in time for the pictures, but thinking on it now, I realize that the stamps are very symbolic of Ryan at this age. So I'm glad they're there.

Now here I am, suckered into buying pictures of my big shot, pre-school boy who poses for strangers. Oh well, at least the $12.50 per sheet saved me in time and effort dragging him to some other portrait studio for a current "professional" picture of him.

The realities of working from home

Working from home seems ideal, doesn't it? There are amazing benefits, but I have to say that there are definitely drawbacks as well. Today, I'm seeing the drawbacks side of things. I can't handle this kind of stress! I can handle one stress at a time, but not multiple stresses all at once. My ADD kicks into overload and I just can't do it.

I help my mom with her business, ideally working 10 hours a week. It's usually closer to 20. Among other things, I help write business plans for companies to use to go to the bank to get a loan to open their franchise. (I'm also the HR "department," I submit payroll and I develop processes to ensure things are running efficiently) Ours is a "hurry up and wait" kind of a business. The client gives us information as they gather it, over the course of several weeks or months, and as soon as they've sent the final piece of information, they want their finished plan ASAP. I generally tell them I can have a first draft for their review within 2 business days. That gives me 2 days of naps and 2 evenings to finish up what's needed.

Yesterday was my only weekly full-work-day (when Mike's mom comes over to watch the kids). I had a client who had an appointment with their lender today and needed the first draft of their business plan...ASAP. I worked on drafts and revised their changes back and forth all day long yesterday. It was a little more complicated than most circumstances because the franchisor (the main owner of the company) was involved and there were several "cooks in the kitchen."

In the middle of all of this, my computer was completely misbehaving. It locked up twice, causing me to reboot and lose changes I'd made, causing me to double check everything again and again, it was a mess. Each plan consists of a Word document and an Excel document. So when there were changes in one document, I needed to make sure both documents were revised, so I had the joy of double checking two things each time. Then, I'd get an email typed up and ready to go with the proper attachments, and when I'd hit "send," I'd get an error message or it would kick me out. CURSES!

By the time Grandma Barb needed to leave, I was still trying to figure out why the client's numbers were screwed up. I put a Curious George show on for Ryan, gave Kaylin some paper and pens to color, then I worked it all out by dinnertime and sent off what the client needed to review. I let them know that I'd be out of the office this morning (no one knows I work from home) because I volunteered at Ryan's school today. So I needed all changes and revisions last night or early this morning if they wanted their final copy for the bank this afternoon.

I didn't hear anything until I checked my email at noon. I made the changes and sent off the final copy. A few minutes later, the frachisor called (the owner of the company) questioning a decision that the franchisee (our client) requested. Mind you, my kids are still awake and I'm hiding in the playroom during the phone call. Kaylin discovered that I was missing and stood at the door, trying to pull it open, crying and begging for me to come out. I put the client on hold (aka "mute" on our home phone) and went on the front porch, thinking that the front door would stifle Kaylin's cries. He asked me to send the changed documents ASAP because they were waiting for me before leaving for the bank. In the meantime, my kids were begging for my attention, Kaylin colored on our blinds with a pen (and the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser didn't even remove it!) and my computer had locked up...again.

I brought Mike's laptop downstairs and waited for it to turn on as I called my mom in a panic and near tears, asking for the franchisee's phone number to verify the change that the franchisor wanted. The phone number was on my desktop computer, which was about to take it's first flight from a second story window. I got the number, went on the front porch again, settled the misunderstanding, rebooted my computer upstairs and took a minute to put Kaylin down for a nap. As I changed her diaper, I discovered that she had also colored all over both legs with pen. Lovely. Back downstairs again, I sat down to work on the laptop and the battery died. It was just at that moment that Ryan finally got sick of being ignored and started in with 20 questions. This is our conversation, verbatim.

"Hey Mommy?" "Yes, Ryan?" "Why did you go like this?" (motioned his hand on his forehead, imitating me)

"Hey Mommy?" "Yes, Ryan?" "Can I have some crackers?" "Yes, they're on the counter. Help yourself."

"Hey Mommy?" "Yes?" "I really love you." "I love you, too, buddy." (likely buttering me up for his next question...)

"Hey Mommy?" "Yes?" "Can I bring my blanket downstairs?" "No, it's almost naptime."

"Mommy?" "What?" "After my nap, can we go swimming?" "If the pool is warm enough, sure."

"Hey Mommy?" "What?!?!?!?" "Next time we have a mom's night at my school, can I put nail polish on my face to make a beard like Daddy?"

That was the straw. I could have handled the frustration of the client's sense of urgency during naptime. But not when I'm trying to be mom, too. I was on the verge of a breakdown.

These are the realities of working from home. I have to squeeze in my job during cracks of time throughout the day. When there's a double ring on the phone, I race for a caller ID phone to see if it's a client or an out of town friend calling. That will determine whether I bribe the kids to stay quiet and hide in a closet or whether I answer the phone calmly in front of them. I cringe when I get a work voicemail at home because our message says, "Mike and Katie" and it's obviously a home number. I care about things like that because I don't want this business to look like some rinky-dink operation. We all work hard to provide the same quality of service to these people by working from home as we would if we drove to an office building to do our jobs.

So here I sit, venting and blogging my troubles away, while watching Curious George with Ryan. I've put off putting him to bed out of guilt; he's been such a trooper this afternoon. I guess I spent all morning in his class, so I can feel okay about that. Good quality time, too - we made cranberry scones and painted with colored Karo syrup. Actually, that's likely why he's being so well behaved and content with me typing instead of playing with him.

Putting my HR hat on: we desperately need a part time Admin to go into my mom's office 1-2 days a week and we need a numbers person (preferably an Accountant) who is an expert in Excel. If you know of anyone, please let me know right away. I should mention that the financial person can live anywhere across the country, but the Admin needs to be local. I just can't seem to get work off the brain. (*sigh*) 'Tis the curse of a work-from-home mom.

Blood and Safety - that's it!

A couple months ago, I had a panel of moms come to be interviewed at 2 Hour Time Out. The conversation spider webbed into the topic of tattling. A friend of mine raised her hand and asked, "At what point does it become not okay for my older daughter to tell me what her sister is doing wrong when I'm out of the room? I kind of like having an informant sometimes." I loved the answer, "Blood and safety are the only reasons my kids can come to me to tell on their sibling without both of them getting in trouble." Genius! Blood and safety - makes sense to me. Almost anything else can be worked out between them. From that day on, I encouraged Ryan to figure it out with Kaylin on his own.

Being the rule-follower that he is, Ryan tells on Kaylin often. "Kaylin took my spoon," or "Kaylin's getting up out of time out," or "Kaylin dropped a Cheerio." It gets old. Even, "Mommy, Kaylin hit me," now gets the response of, "Tell her not to hit you." (he usually does something to prompt the smack in the first place, but Kaylin doesn't have the words to tell me why she was provoked, so if he doesn't want to be hit, he needs to learn to not steal her toy or deliberately push her sippy cup off of her high chair tray)

As most of you know, I didn't have siblings, so figuring these things out on my own isn't natural. And why reinvent the wheel? If someone else - with well behaved kids, of course - has a tip or a trick for a struggle I'm dealing with...PLEASE! Share!!

So Ryan is learning the definition of "safety." When Ryan tells on Kaylin (usually for breaking a house-rule), I ask if there's blood or if it's a safety issue. Ryan is having trouble understanding safety. For instance, he believes that taking a strawberry off his plate at lunch is a safety issue. He tried to convince me of that today. "But it IS a safety issue, Mommy!"

I'm learning to not respond to every squeal or whine and to let the kids work it out on their own. It's made me a much calmer parent, actually. I get involved and instruct proper responses enough as it is...they have to learn to figure these things out on their own eventually, it may as well be now. Ryan was never a tattle tail, until recently. I'm sure it's the result of him and Kaylin finally playing together and wanting the same toys, snacks, etc. I'm done trying to uncover who did what and who was at fault. If you tattle, everyone gets in trouble. In my experience, it's usually the retaliator (yes, I make up words) that is noticed and punished, not the initiator. So I'm done breaking up every little fight. DONE, I say. And I'm sticking to it. I'm over-controlling in enough areas of my life...this, I'm letting go.

Roger update

Yesterday afternoon, we lost Roger. I was kind of convinced that if I pulled the solar cover back off the pool, I'd see him at the bottom. Thankfully, when Mike got home from work, he found him under one of our lantana bushes. He's very happy there...he slept there last night and is there again now. And I have since blocked underneath the pool fence so he's forced to stay in the grass or on the patio. He should be safe now.

To answer your questions:

* Yes, someone came to claim a lost turtle last night. The guy was turtle-sitting and lost it. But this wasn't the turtle he was sitting for. So there's another lost turtle wondering the streets?!??!

* I've gotten several indications that this might be an endangered desert tortoise. He seems pretty happy here...we gave him a strawberry this morning and he devoured it. If he is a "wild turtle" (who would have thought?) I'm quite sure he's never had a strawberry! While he ate his breakfast, Ryan wanted to eat, too. Outside. And of course, Kaylin joined him and they both ate breakfast with Roger. (he's on the left side of the picture)

* If this is the type of turtle that gets as big as a Goodyear tire, we will not be keeping him. So Rachel, he's all yours. I'll let you know. If the kids get too attached, we'll get a smaller turtle that stays small.

Make yourself at home, Roger

I'm not sure if Roger will be staying with us, but let me introduce him. He is the little turtle that was crossing the road near our mailbox on our way home from Ryan's school today. Well, I couldn't just leave him there - he could have been run over. And "wild turtles" aren't common around these parts, so I'm sure he's someone's pet who likely dug under their block wall and escaped.

This is one of the most exciting things that's happened around here in a while. The kids were absolutely enamored with Roger. (BTW, I suggested cute T-name choices like Trevor, Timmy and Tucker, but Ryan chose Roger, so Roger it is)

As Roger explored our house, the kids followed him around, giggling and imitating his crawl. He's actually fairly fast...maybe he's used to running away from toddlers?

Because we're out of lettuce and I'm ignorant about turtles, I googled their diet and took out some spaghetti squash from the freezer. He went to town on that, but ignored the tortilla chip that Kaylin offered him from her high chair. I like him already - he's such a good example for healthy eating!!!

When Mike went back to work after lunch, Ryan asked him to give Roger kisses. I thought he'd fake it, but he actually kissed his head which surprised the poor creature to death!

We let him roam around outside with supervision and he eventually settled into a teeny, shady spot under Kaylin's swing for a nap. How cute is that? I need to remember to check on him in a few minutes and transfer him to a safe box so he doesn't sneak past the fence and find our pool.

With signs posted on the mailbox, I'm certain Roger's family will call to claim him once they discover that he's missing. I've known Phoenix turtle owners before and when their turtle disappears, they've always assumed it was a hawk who swiped it from the backyard. I'm hoping that rescuing him from the street was the right answer. If no one claims him, we might have ourselves our first pet!

Morning photo shoot

I take a lot of pictures in order to get both of my kids looking in the same direction and appearing half-way pleasant. Kaylin was so cute this morning in a little lined dress, hose with a ruffley bum and her Easter shoes. So I sat the kids down for a photo shoot. The first few pictures I took weren't bad, but Ryan couldn't keep his hands away from his face.

So I suggested he clasp his hands and put them in his lap...

That didn't look posed, did it? Show your sister some love, Ryan...

Okay, new tactic...do anything I can to make them laugh. Unfortunately, when one smiles, the other doesn't. The other smiles, the first one looks away.
Kaylin finally got bored and collapsed...

Alas, one decent picture of them both. Not perfect, but good enough. Totally staged, but what do I care?

Jaime's PREGNANT!!!

For those of you who know my bridesmaid, Jaime, you will be shocked to hear that she's pregnant!!! And yes, it was planned. (that noise you just heard was a gasp from around the globe) Brenda, Ashleigh and Nicole are in shock and my mom's likely crying.

In high school, Jaime talked about getting her tubes tied. No joke. It's not that she doesn't like kids, she just never thought it was in the cards for her. She married a guy who adored kids, but they agreed that they'd be a dog-loving family and spend their years traveling the world. They've been married for 10 years and have, indeed, traveled the world. But to everyone's surprise, recently ended up deciding to bring a baby into their amazing marriage. Zach and Jaime (or as the priest called them at their wedding, "Jack and Zamie") are going to be SUCH great parents. I cried when she called me today (not to mention that I screamed and freaked out, probably rupturing her eardrum) and am tearing up now as I type this.

I realize there are only half a dozen of you reading who even know my sweet friend or care that she's pregnant, but I'm so excited that I have to share.

This is a picture of us before our senior prom in 1994. My boyfriend wouldn't take me (he was a stellar guy) so I went with one of my best friends, Creig. It so happened that Jaime and my date had been a thing for a few weeks (or longer?) so when Jaime caught her date making out with some random girl (someone else's date...at the after prom party at his house), she stole my date for the evening. I didn't mind...they were so cute together and I was enamored with the other, more "quality" fella. Ahhhh, high school.

This other picture is from 2002...she lives in San Francisco now, so I only see her occasionally and couldn't find a more recent picture of us together. (pathetic, I know)

So CONGRATULATIONS JAIME!

I am so excited for you!!!

Open windows invite the world in

We had a little cold(ish) front blow in the last few days and it's been nice enough to have our windows open again, all day and all night. It's so funny to hear the world around us. Funny "ha ha" and funny "could someone please close the windows?!?!?"

I believe our neighbors behind us have moved, because last fall, all I heard all day was, "Keifer! GET! OUT! SIDE!" Little Keifer and his brother would run around in their diapers with no clothes on, outside for hours. (yes, I got nosey and peeked from my upstairs windows once) Their mother was horribly mean to them. It broke my heart and I felt led to pray for them often. Sending kids out to play for a little bit is one thing, but when I heard her scream at them to "get back outside!" over and over again at various times all day, well, it really ate at me. When she wasn't yelling at them to stay outside, it was "what are you doing!??!?! NOOOOOOO!" What did she expect from toddlers trapped outside? They're unsupervised!!!

All sorts of things are allowed into my house when I open my windows. Smoke, for instance. Someone nearby goes out in their backyard to smoke every night and in a matter of moments, our entire kitchen smells like a sports bar.

Then there are the neighbors directly next to us with 4 kids and one on the way. The oldest is a teenager and she screams...a lot. When they started swimming last Spring, the screaming...OH the screaming! It was obnoxious. When she got splashed, when her younger siblings annoyed her, when she was delighted, very loud screaming for hours.

A few weeks ago, another neighbor bought their dog a new squeeky toy. The dog gnawed on it. All...night...long. I wonder if someone said something, because I haven't heard it in a while. Or maybe they brought the dog in the house at night. Either way, I'm glad that's over!

Then last night, a pack of coyotes must have found some food in the preserve near our house because there was quite a howling celebration. As it began, I actually thought it was Kaylin crying faintly, until I realized it was a choir of cries. (ironically, she did start crying about an hour later...still not sure why...do kids get nightmares this early?)

But I'm saddened that we're going to have to close up the house soon. Before long, we'll be begging the kids to close the sliding door behind them "because the A/C is on" and there won't be a gentle breeze drifting through the house. Of course, I won't have to dust nearly as often and the bottoms of my socks won't be black at the end of the day. The daily vacuuming, dusting and sweeping I can live without. Fine...every other day, but still. The cool breeze will be replaced with the scent of sunscreen as we spend our days in the pool and run all of our errands before 11am to avoid melting in the parked car. I guess we can still have picnic lunches outside, as long as everyone has wet bathing suits on to keep them cool. Okay, I'm mentally ready for summer now that I've worked it out in my head! Bring it on!

Mommy and Me night

Ryan's school had a "Mom's Night" tonight...I tell you what, this school is so great! We both had a really good time.

Ryan made me a hat (which I proudly wore all night)...
...he shaved my legs (with a popsicle stick)...

...he polished my nails with glitter polish...and his own...I did his toes for him. That was the best part of the night for him, that he got his toe nails polished, just like Kaylin. He was beaming with pride, skipping around and careful not to touch anything while they dried. I warned him that we'd have to take it off in the morning because Mike didn't like the idea very much. (click on the picture to see his all-over paint job...many of the moms' hands and feet looked like that as they left the nail area)

I'm still here...

Missing me these last few days? I know some of you check the blog for new posts daily...sorry to disappoint you recently. I've been super busy working for my mom tirelessly. Mike took Monday off for us to spend as family and I ended up working for 10 hours (while he watched the kids) to take care of some emergencies. I barely took a break for dinner. Between yesterday and today, I've worked another 12 hours. My mother in law got the stomach flu, so she couldn't babysit today, but my generous friend (with 4 kids of her own) offered to take Ryan and Kaylin for a few hours. Granted, it was during naptime and Ryan probably kept her son occupied all afternoon (despite the occasional feuds) but it was an amazing offer and I got a good 4 hours of work done, which was great.

I got my hair done today...I had her cut a bunch off. It was getting too long and too heavy to look cute. One of these days I'll learn to get my hair done on a day when I'm not sitting around the house and wasting the style! I can never get my hair to do what the stylists can.

Okay, I've worked until 11:00 the last 2 nights and vowed I would go to sleep early tonight. And here it is already 9:30. Not early enough for me. That said, I'm off to bed!

Wasting Time

I hate it. I hate wasting time! Hate might be a strong word, but I can easily say that wasting time is one of my biggest pet peeves. I'm not talking about standing in line or sitting in the waiting room at the doctor's office. Those things are expected time wasters. You anticipate how long it should be, give or take, and relax for a few minutes waiting your turn. However, getting in "that line" with the slowest checker in the entire store (and watching as 6 people in the next aisle check out and leave before you even unload your groceries onto the conveyor belt...that's happened to me) or waiting 2 hours for an annual checkup only to find out that your doctor is delivering twins at a hospital 30 minutes away (they couldn't have told me that when I got there? Or better yet, called me at work that morning so I didn't have to take a 2 hour lunch hour, plus drive time, only to have to reschedule?!?!) - those things are a complete waste of my time and they drive me insane.

My mom agreed to babysit Friday night so we could have our first date night since our anniversary 2 months ago and at the last minute, offered to keep the kids overnight at her house. Yippee! We actually slept in until 8:45 yesterday...it was glorious. That meant that we had to rush a little to get to our chiropractic appointment and hit the gym.

As I called to ask the chiro not to lock the doors because we'd be arriving right at 9:30 (when they take their last client), the gal said that we could get our adjustment after the "spinal workshop that Mike signed us both up for." I should mention that my chiro is more into education and long term corrective care than quick fixes. I whole-heartedly agree with his approach and style. But I've been avoiding these workshops for months because after 6 years of faithfully going to them and their sister office, I know a lot about the subject and don't want to spend my precious weekends hearing repeat information. Unfortunately, Mike agreed to sign us up (forgetting to mention it to me) just in case there was something new to learn. Fine. I'll sit there for 30 minutes. At least the kids weren't with us to disturb everyone.

30 minutes turned into 45 and afterward, we were in line to get adjusted behind 5 other people. So we didn't get out of there until 10:45. My mom was supposed to drop the kids off at 11:30, so we didn't have time to go the gym, but we could probably hike the mountain near our house really quick. We ran home to get water and sunscreen (arriving at 11:10) and my mom and the kids were already home. SO our leisurely, child-free morning, filled with a quick adjustment (which I desperately needed because my shoulder has been bothering me since my kick boxing class last week) and a nice workout (the first I've had since before-mentioned class since I've been trying to keep sick Kaylin away from the Kids Club) and a few errands turned into an entire morning at the chiropractor. Wasted time, in my opinion.

Mike likened it to the time (early in our marriage) that we listened to a vacuum salesman's schpeal at 9:30 at night to get a free 2 night hotel room gift certificate. We used free airline tickets to fly to Florida, only to find out that the hotel would then force us to listen to a 3 hour time share presentation or charge us a fee to stay there. Fine, we agreed. We got there Friday night and the presentation was Saturday morning, off site somewhere. It was January, so I was excited to go to lay in the sun...I got dressed in my swimsuit and a tank top, so we wouldn't waste any time after the presentation...we'd just walk right out to the beach when they dropped us back at our hotel. We sat for 3 hours near a window, slowly seeing the amazing, sunny day be overtaken by a cloudy sky. The 3 hours we were trapped in that room were the only 3 hours of sunlight the entire weekend. I vowed to never sit through any kind of presentation for any kind of freebies EVER again. Period.

Back to yesterday. If you can't tell, this wasted morning gave me a horrible, bad attitude and when I called a friend to vent, she suggested that I take my nasty self and go hiking alone. That actually did the trick! I got my workout, was able to enjoy God's beautiful creation all around me, cleared my head and got to expose my winter-white legs to some daylight.

Afterward, the kids got up from their nap and we went to meet Mike's family. Ryan's been looking forward to bowling with Grandpa for weeks, so when yesterday worked out for them, I didn't want to reschedule, even though we had plans at night. The first bowling ally we went to was packed, no open lanes. They suggested another place and we drove there. Packed. We tried someplace else, finally getting a couple of lanes. We bowled until 5:15, cutting it kind of close to go to our friend's house for dinner at 5:30. We skipped going back home to get the side dish (that I'd spent plenty of time and effort cooking, chopping and preparing) and ran into the grocery store for something quick and different. My morning mood quickly returned. Driving all over town to find an available bowling ally - waste of time. Making a huge pasta salad to feed 20 people only to have it go uneaten and unused - waste of time. (we'll be eating pasta salad at every meal for the next week, if you're interested) I wish I could blow off these things, but sometimes, they just ANNOY me!!!

My life is very full, in many regards, but my schedule is the "full" part that people comment on the most. I don't expect everything to go smoothly, but I'll admit that I rarely build major time wasters into my busiest days. Because I hate them and avoid them at all costs. I know who the slow cashiers are at certain stores I frequent. I know the best time to shop, go to the bank and get my car washed so I can spend more quality time doing things I enjoy, rather than waiting in an unnecessary line. I rarely even talk on the phone anymore because email is so much more convenient for me. And actually, nowadays, I hardly seem to send personal emails since I blog...sorry for losing my personal touch, everyone!!! I am an efficiency freak. There! I said it! And I have to say that it works well for me unless I forget to slow down at appropriate times. (say, on the weekends...) On that note, I'm off to go relax now!

Big girl toes

This is a right of passage for all girls, I think. I never thought I'd be polishing Kaylin's toes this early, but as she was snuggling on my lap this morning and I was looking at her tiny little feet, I couldn't help myself. She's been so quiet and mellow lately that she sat still enough for me to do it. How cute is this?!?

Let the imagination begin...

Ryan's really starting to get an imagination. This morning, he came out of his room with a blanket tucked into both the front and back of his shorts, announcing that he was a "milking cow." (I'm guessing the blankets were udders?) Then after his nap, he came down the hall with outstretched arms, saying, "Nnnnyyyyyyyyrrrrrrrmmm..." because he was an airplane. This is a new thing for him.

An update on Kaylin: she hasn't gotten sick since yesterday morning. WOO HOO! But we've had 2 blow-out experiences today that proved her body is still trying to rid itself of the bug. I dressed her today for the first time since Sunday, and the first blow out resulted in removing her pants and the second got all over her shirt, so I had to do another load of laundry (including her highchair seat cover - I've done more laundry in the last 3 days than the last 3 weeks combined) and an immediate bath. YUCK! Still, I'll take that over vomit any day. My mom brought up something interesting today: she's allergic to peanuts and on Saturday, we went to Mike's uncle's house and he has pecan trees. The kids gathered shelled pecans (it was like an Easter egg hunt...they had so much fun finding them!) and my mom suggested today that maybe she's also allergic to pecans and somehow she either ate some or the oils made her sick? Who knows, it's a theory. When she turns two, I'd like to take her back the allergist to see if she's outgrown the peanut allergy and if she's allergic to any other nuts.

So she's doing better, but still noticably not feeling well. We gave her applesauce for dinner last night (the first food she kept down) and again for breakfast, then she had a 1/2 of a banana and some toast later in the day. (My mom made me cinnamon toast when I was sick growing up, so I made her some today. Okay fine, and I made some for myself, too. It's such a comfort food for me! I haven't had it in years.) We haven't strayed much from the B.R.A.T. diet. She was very still and quiet all day yesterday and today slept from 10-2:30...all day, for her. Then she laid down on the chair (which she never does) and watched t.v. all afternoon. Below are a couple of pictures of her taken an hour apart. She literally didn't move for almost 2 hours while I baked with Ryan and tried giving him some one-on-one attention. I've had her on my lap for the better part of the last 3 days, so my poor boy's been completely acting out. I figured out tonight that he just wants attention, but has repeatedly disobeyed to get in trouble! Bad attention is better than no attention?

Quite a messy day...

I'll just come out and say it: vomit is messy. Since noon, Kaylin has thrown up at least 10-12 times. I've lost count. I learned (slowly) some tricks on how to best deal with the issue with minimal mess. I'll try not to get into too much detail of the gross stuff, but I really have to share some of the things I'm figuring out along the way.

#1 - It all started on the drive home from church today; Kaylin cried and whined the whole time. Once home, I put her on my lap and calmed her down for a while before sending her off to play. When I put her down, she parked herself on the bottom stair and didn't move for several minutes. Then it happened. She threw up all over the place...mostly on the tile, thank goodness. Ryan burst out crying, I scooped Kaylin up to strip her down and clean her off and Mike took care of the floor. It was chaos. That was the first of many to come.

#2 - It was naptime, so after she was clean and changed into new clothes, I put her to bed. Shortly after, I heard coughing and walked in to find her in the process of #2. I cleaned her up, Mike changed her sheet, and I got smart and put her back to bed with just a diaper.

#3 - A little while later, Mike heard coughing and we went in to clean up #3. Mike brought Kaylin to the bathroom, I changed the sheet (we're now out of sheets, so I put a towel down to cover the mattress).

#4 - It didn't take long for her to vomit again. There was nothing in her stomach, so it was clear and dry heaves, mostly. Somewhere in between #2 and #4, she actually did sleep a little, so we decided to get her up since everything was stripped off of her mattress and I had no where to put her. (I realize now I could have pulled out the Pack and Play...not sure what I was thinking.)

#5 - Mike took Ryan to his volleyball game and I stayed home with Kaylin. Before they left, Mike made smoothies and Kaylin seemed starving, so I gave her a few sips. She was on my lap watching Food Network with me and along came #5. I had a towel nearby, so I kept the mess to a minimum and was able to carry her and the towel to the kitchen sink for a hose-down. I had put another outfit on her (for some reason) so I went back to the "only a diaper" theory.

#6 - We went back to the family room and I gave her some Cheerios, thinking they were bready and bland. No harm there, right? Wrong. But this time I actually put a towel under her and on the chair, so when she was done getting sick, I scooped her up with the towel and contained the mess again. The bummer is that I was actually up in the kitchen getting her amazing-catch-all-bib as it happened. I was about 20 seconds too late with that idea. Oh - and the hilarious thing is that before I got up to get the bib, she was singing, "Happy Birthday," so this is what I heard: "Happy Bir-day oo you, Happy Bir-day oo you..." (cough) "Happy Bir-day deahh Daddy, Happy Bir-day oo you!" She actually kept singing after she threw up, without skipping a beat.

#7 - By this point, I had restricted her to just water. She drank slowly, but seemed super thirsty and I didn't want her to get dehydrated. But she couldn't even keep that down. Thank goodness for the bib! It caught almost all of it.

#8 - So there we were, me sitting on the chair with a towel on my lap, Kaylin on the towel (with just a diaper and a bib on) watching Food Network together. She was paying WAY too much attention and her breathing got very steady, so I figured she was getting tired again. Then came the yawns and I finally put her back to bed. One of the sheets was in the dryer by now, so that was good news. Within 5 minutes, I heard coughing. I peeked in, and she was dry heaving again, but there was enough saliva to soak the sheet. (*sigh*) By this point, all I could do was wipe it up and cover the sheet with a towel (going the wrong way) to provide her dry place to lie.

#9 - After dinner, I noticed on the video monitor that she was sitting up, so I went up to get her. She didn't say anything (which is unusual) - she just lifted her arms in the air for me to pick her up. Just when we got downstairs, her chest started heaving and I had just enough time to run her over to the sink.

#10 (and #11 +++) - From this point, I was wiped out, so Mike took over. I gave the run down of what I'd learned: nothing but a diaper and a bib, sit her on a towel on your lap, she can't keep anything down, so no food or liquids. I heard some coughing and crying downstairs and I was so thankful that he had everything under control. She's back to sleep now; I should probably go check on her. I have a feeling it's going to be a long night!

Ryan's first lie

I've mentioned how honest Ryan is several times, right? Even to his own detriment. The rule I grew up with was that I wouldn't get punished as harshly if I told the truth (even after telling a lie) than if my mom found out the truth on her own. That kept me pretty honest (most of the time) so we're going to keep with that theory in our family. Ryan's heard this a few times, so he usually tells the truth right away. Until today.

He came into our room this morning, fully dressed, announcing that he had already done all of his chores. I went through each one to confirm. Did you make your bed? Yes. Pick up your toys? Yes. Brush your teeth? Yes. Hmmm...I hadn't heard the water running, but maybe I just wasn't listening for it.

A little bit later, while I was brushing my teeth, I asked Ryan if he remembered to put the cap back on the toothpaste in his bathroom. He thought about it and said, "Oh, I'm sorry for lying, Mommy. I didn't brush my teeth," and ran off to accomplish the task. Mike overheard this and decided that since this is the first time he's come right out and lied, we needed to let him know how serious the offense is in our house and punish him. He decided that Ryan wouldn't get to watch tv all day today. I thought that sounded appropriate...we're not home much during the day, so he watches a show or two during breakfast, rarely before naps, but always after naps. He is completely addicted to Curious George and for the past few weeks, has preferred to watch the DVR-ed shows rather than what's live on Disney. Fine by me, they're great little shows that teach math and science, have a positive message and don't ever display nasty attitudes or other habits that I don't want to see mimicked.

I didn't think Ryan would be too upset about the tv, but I was wrong. He burst into tears, crying, "But I want to watch tv!" I didn't realize the depth of his addiction to Curious George! He cried for quite a while, begging for us to change our minds, to the point that I finally told him not to ask for tv for the rest of the day or I'd take away an additional privilege. He knew the decision and we weren't changing our minds. That seemed to do the trick.

What's kind of cool is that because it was so quiet at breakfast, Mike pulled out the color and shape flashcards for Kaylin. Ryan knew them all by 16 months, far before he could talk he could pick the right card out of the pile (even the octagon!) because that was the game Mike liked to play every day after work. Needless to say, with our second child, this game has been ignored. I was pretty surprised that Kaylin said the names of a few of the shapes and a couple colors. I'm curious if she could pick them out on her own, not relying on her words to be understood. I might try that later. The cool part that I was referring to was that Ryan got as much out of doing the flashcards as Kaylin did. He praised her and said, "Pretty close!" when she'd say the wrong answer, it was really sweet. So I'm looking forward to how the lack of tv today will spark his imagination. Again, not that he watches it often, but it seems to be the go-to when he can't figure out what else to do.

Kaylin-isms

Kaylin is growing up SO fast. In the last 2 days, I've had several people (who see her regularly) say that she seems tall/has had a growth spurt. And I've noticed her teeny feet are finally filling out. (I wonder if I should stop putting those cute size 4 shoes on her and move up to the size 5s I finally bought?) Here are some other new things worth remembering:

• She suddenly loves to color. ALL the time. I'm just not used to a child of mine being so intrigued with something so simple! She colors at the gym daycare, colors before dinner, colors on my lap at the computer...and she's captivated by watching me write notes. She seriously will watch me write for full 30 seconds, in pure amazement, before going back to coloring.


• She's also really into playing with Ryan now. Maybe it's because they can go in the backyard together and go on the swing set or do bubbles or play with sidewalk chalk...whatever the reason, there have been days that they'll go outside and play by themselves for 30 minutes or more while I cook dinner. I'm so glad they get along so well!


• I've mentioned that my kids repeat, "Mommy" all the live-long day, right? Well, Kaylin decided that I wasn't answering her fast enough yesterday in the car and said, "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy" to the tune of "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" through the whole song, up until the "...how I wonder what you are" line at the very end.


• She's been particularly whiney and clingy lately and now I know why...she has two, sharp eye-teeth poking through her little gums. A little Tylenol suddenly cures her whiney-ness. HALLAleuiah!


• This morning, I came back upstairs to get dressed and Kaylin come "running" into my bathroom with a huge, proud smile. She would normally stay downstairs with Ryan and Daddy, so I thought she was proud of herself for climbing the stairs and finding where I'd escaped to...until she opened and said, "Aahhhh..." and showed me the sticker she was gnawing on. Ryan always did that at this age, too: they both rat themselves out when they put something in their mouth that they shouldn't.


• I'm finally to a point where I do her hair every day, instead of just slipping a clip in to hold her bangs off of her face, leaving the rest of her bed-head to settle down on its own. I suppose it's about time I fixed up her ragamuffin hair. I put a little pig tail in her hair and she always asks for a bow or flower.


• She also mixes up words lately. For instance, she'll say, "oh-pah, those" for "open (closed)," her word for "off" is "out" and her word for "closed" is "off"


• Oh, and this morning, Kaylin wanted to sit at the kitchen table next to Ryan. She was done eating her breakfast, but Ryan still had a full bowl of cereal. She was readjusting and lost her balance and when she reached for the table to stop her fall, she stuck her hand into the corner of Ryan's bowl. The milk and cereal went flying, landing on both kids and all over the table, chairs and floor. I immediately pulled Kaylin back onto her chair and went to grab towels to clean everyone up. Ryan got attention first because he was complaining the most, but it didn't take long for me to look over at Kaylin and I wish I could burn that picture into my brain forever! She was perfectly still, only her eyes were moving around the room. Her hands were half hovering in the air (like "ew, gross") and milk and cereal bits dripping off her hair and face, even her eyelashes. And she wasn't saying a word. It was so sweet, yet so sad, that she was patiently waiting for help, all the while being virtually ignored. For a split second, I thought about grabbing my camera, but that would have been, well, kind of mean!